The loss of 25 year old cowboy Ty Pozzobon is hitting the rodeo community hard. As it should. But not just because he was an amazingly talented young gun in the sport of bull riding, although that will be his legacy. It should be a loud and clear reminder to the rodeo community and all sports communities that concussions are not just a bump on the head. They can have long lasting, painful repercussions that include physical pain and often grappling with mental health issues on top of everything else.
25 years old, married to a beautiful woman, an only son to doting parents and already a superstar. Many will pull out their judgment cards and talk about the selfishness of this tragedy. Not me. Sadly, I understand. I understand all too well. A person can have the world by the tail and still go down that road. And go down that road because they don't want the people they love to be drug down by them in their "state" or that they cannot stand the thought of never being the same or "normal" again.
A brave man with a little crazy in him - because, let's face it, all bull riders have to have a little crazy in them - got knocked around a few too many times and his brain would be recovering slower each time. You have the world at your feet, a Canadian Champ, 4th place in the world and your brain doesn't work as well as you want it to. It's still in recovery mode, it needs rest, it is causing issues for you in your day to day life. You can't do what you love, what you feel you were born to do. You can't love people the way you used to because it takes a lot of energy. You start to question your worth... The depression starts to roll in and then stays.
I am not speaking for this cowboy as I never met him, though I watched him a number of times in a variety of arenas. I don't know that this is what happened in his head. What I know is that it could be. Or it could be a variation of it. But head injuries cause real issues - physical and mental and they take their toll. I can speak from my experience both in the post concussion area and the area of depression though mine came about in reverse order. It isn't easy feeling like you can't think straight, you can't see straight, you can't concentrate, focus or move as quickly or smoothly as you once did. It does make you question your worth... If I can't do all of these things, how am I going to work? Work makes it worse, if I don't take time to rest, I am going to make things worse yet, but if I take the time I need, will my job be there when I get better? Will I get better? How am I going to pay my bills? The questions and strain can pile up. The pile can become rocks in your pockets when you are barely treading water. I can understand that some days, it would be easier to stop treading.
It's time to look out for our athletes. It's time to talk about concussions like the brain injuries that they are. It is time to talk about depression and how you should be able to get help without being judged. It's time to be kind and treat others the way we want to be treated.
My heart breaks for this family and his friends. I hope that they all are able to take something from this tragedy. I hope that the big name bull riders will put a damn helmet on and stop bragging about being a "real cowboy" by wearing a hat and set a good example for our young guns. I hope that the bull riders will use their celebrity status to work towards a better way in the future - promote supportive recovery, end the stigma of "what we can't see doesn't exist". It has stimulated some conversation in our house and I am glad. I am not glad that Ty is gone. I am glad that we can talk about it and dig into the why and look at ways to make things better in the future. Wouldn't it be a wonderful world if no one else had to live through another sad story? Namaste and RIP Ty.
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